The Rest of the Prizes

Hi everybody, and welcome to the Saturday funnies (I hope).

Way back when, we had a Famous-Dead-Person Blog contest, with all participants invited to offer a word for a limerick if they provided a username for the famous dead person. Well, everybody did! Goodbear’s limerick was posted on my “Turtle’s Latest Limerick” sidebar on April 28th for a week, and may now be seen on my “Limericks of the Turtle” page. Last Saturday, I posted three limericks; there are four more to go, including one for Chris.

Here then, are the remaining four limericks, with the dates on which they’ll be posted on my sidebar and added to the “Limericks of the Turtle” page. Enjoy! (And if you didn’t read the grand prize, 499 words on the topic of Jack’s mom’s choice, you can catch it here.)

Okay, this first one is for Shelley, who asked for a limerick with the word “travel” in it. It’ll be sidebarred on May 28th.

• I’m travelin’ on down the line
• With sev’ral great Cardis of mine.
• We’ll see friends of yore,
• And might get a good score.
• Either way it’s okay — I feel fine!

 

Next is the limerick for Livingisdetail, who offered the word “procession”. This one will be sidebarred on June 7th.

• The Lady Godiva’s procession
• Has made quite a lasting impression.
• Her shiftless noblesse
• Is still seen as a test
• Of good stewardship during recession.

 

Third, and second-last, is another one for Jack’s mum, who offered the word “flash”. June 14 will herald its week of front-page fame.

• I now see my purchase was rash.
• Though this white bathing suit is quite flash,
• If I don’t lose (I fear)
• Twenty pound and ten year,
• It will raise not a single eyelash.

 

And finally, here is one for Chris, who didn’t specify a word, so I chose one for him: “president”. I’m not convinced of its suitability as family material, so if you’re reading these aloud to the kiddies you may want to tell them that this one isn’t funny, which it probably isn’t anyway. (There was enough scandal over Gerald the other day.) It will be featured for the week of June 21st.

• A president’s job is a tough one,
• And a journalist’s tongue is a rough one.
• After one photo-op
• At Ye Olde Sausage Shoppe,
• Headlines read, “Leader told where to stuff one.”

 

And today is Puppy Pickup Day, which means I have to run away now and won’t be able to visit your blogs till tomorrow. I wish you all a luscious weekend. A la prochaine!

In Principio Erat Blogos (a contest)

“Hello-o-o-o, evry-bud-deeeee! This is your old pal Grover, with aynother contest, that’s right, ay nice contest, mm-hmm!”

If Sesame Street’s cute-and-loveable, fuzzy-little Grover decided to write a blog, what would he name it? Or if naturalist Charles Darwin had a blog, how would he entitle it? Or how about heavyweight champion Muhammad Ali? Or Scottish inventor Alexander Graham Bell? You decide! I think enough of us had enough fun with last month’s contest that it’s time for another one.

Rules

1. Choose someone fairly famous and completely dead (puppets, cartoon personalities, and characters from novels are all eligible). Someone with an unfamous name, but who did something famous, also counts.
2. Describe the person in one phrase (e.g. “who invented eraser-topped pencils”, or “first European in Tasmania”).
3. Give a humorous, fitting (or ironic) blog title.
4. Bonus: Give that person’s username.
5. If you supply a username, you’re an automatic winner! Provide me with a word, and I’ll use it in a limerick. New limericks go up on each date divisible by seven, and all limericks are kept on my “Limericks of the Turtle” page.

Judging

Like last time, I will seek out approximately two dozen non-blogging acquaintances to judge the entries. Judges will be asked to pick the entry that is funniest to them.

Prizes

• First prize: Again, like last time, I will write 500 words on the topic of the winner’s choice.
• Second prizes: See rules 4 and 5 above. Please provide your limerick word along with your entry.

Deadline

Saturday morning, April 26, at 07 00 Eastern Standard Time. Winner to be announced by Sunday evening.

I can hardly wait!