Hermeneutically Sealed (Saturday Funnies)

May 17, 2008

Foulksrath Castle Hostel
Foulksrath Castle Hostel, Ireland. The one place where the Tilley quick-dry guarantee fails.

I got some pretty strange looks from customers at the pet store this week. I like to think of myself as occasionally witty, but with this week’s lack of sleep, I more closely resembled a half-wit. I briefly wondered how close to the cash register I could hang my two bachelor’s degrees, the graduate diploma, the PSW certificate, my ORCA basic Flatwater badge, and the happy grades for courses ranging from First Aid to Watercolour Painting to Editing, but I was too tired to stay miffed for more than a sentence at a time. I floated through the two days, a vacant smile on my face, keeping the counter firmly in place with my elbows. I didn’t even attempt to spin the can labels.

So this morning, before running off to feed Robert and Jane’s cats, I thought I would put some half-assessed effort into compiling a lexicon of completely unrelated terms. Some of these come from recent exchanges with other bloggers, some have been part of my cranial spaghetti for a long time, and one or more of them, if we’re both lucky, might make you smile. Happy weekend!


aplomb: [← Fr panache, ← white I rock, ← masc You the man, ← Helen Reddy I am strong! I am invincible! , ← Gk aplomb.]

breathe: Thoft, thoothing wind.

elytra (sing. elytron) :  Hard, shiny wing casing on beetles. Usage: Comm, deterrent to lingering customers: “Say, did you know you have spots on your inner elytra?”

few roos loose in the top paddock, a: Kangaroos culpable of stealing sandwiches from picnic baskets.

hermeneutically sealed: Hunting in this area restricted to theologians.

Invention is the necessity of motherhood: ≈ Hard times call for desperate measures; usu re int furnishgs or dom cuisine. [Attr. Lavender Bay, 1980s.]

latté: Breakfast drink discouraging workplace punctuality.

pictureskew: Panoramic, scenic. [*Br sp picturesque.]

tooth hockey: [regionalism] Stick-handling motions, during fake fights, of open jaws of two dogs. = jawing.

unawares: Garments laundered in hostel sinks and hung on bunk bed rails to dry overnight.