Lime-rickey? (A Small Prize or Two)

Uh-oh, I hope you haven’t been surprisled, disguisled, or misled by today’s title. I’m hoping for a little sudden brilliance here, in order for a limerick or two to sprout from my sinuous synapses and fevered fingers. Here goes.

I. The cumquat limerick, for Alyson.

Culinary research courtesy of Wikipedia and Razzle Dazzle Recipes.

  • “The small Asian citrus, the cumquat,”
  • Anne read, “should not go in a rumpot.
  • It works much more swelly
  • In a marm’lade or jelly.”
  • Was Anne disappointed? Well, somewhat.


II. The leprechaun limerick, for Jack.

Jack had accidentally spelled “leprosy” when he meant to ask for a limerick on “leprechauns”, so I managed to work both words into the following. Jack, when you get a little older, you’ll probably read some fiction by a guy named James Joyce. This limerick is a tribute to him.

  • I once met an elderly leprechaun
  • Who appeared too ferocious to look upon.
  • In his youth, friends mistook him
  • As ill, and forsook him,
  • So he’d exiled himself as a leper gone.


III. The Sasquatch limerick, for Livingisdetail.

This one’s kinda scraping the bottom of the barrel, or keg… Researched on the Ontario Sasquatch Research website — all but the final line, which can be demystified here.

  • A Sasquatch was sighted in Acton!
  • And Georgian Bay, Dundalk, and Dryden,
  • Kapuskasing and Grimsby,
  • Belleville, Brockville, and Lindsay.
  • Ontarians sure like their Molson.


Tune in tomorrow for more Loony Limericks! Unless, of course, I go off on some other tangent. Ta-ta!

13 Responses to Lime-rickey? (A Small Prize or Two)

  1. Jack says:

    Thanks so much – it’s great. You even got leprosy into it!

  2. lavenderbay says:

    Hey, you’re welcome, Jack. Sometimes a bunch of odd ingredients will make a decent soup, if you let them simmer long enough.

  3. Shelley says:

    Wow!!! Dundalk rates a mention 🙂

    I got notice of a K9 Cruise next February….I don’t know that they’ll need a limerick writer but they sure have an educational panel on board giving seminars.

    I kept it just in case Chris is well enough for me to go 🙂

  4. livingisdetail says:

    Love it! I can’t BELIEVE you are suggesting that such sightings are related in anyway to having a few too many drinkies. LOL 🙂 In Australia we have this strange, floating light that follows people called The Min Min Light, which has been sighted mainly around the ruins of an old Queensland Pub. Most people put these sightings down to too much of the local drop – Bundaberg Rum.

  5. lavenderbay says:

    Yes, Shelley, when I saw Dundalk (actually 3 or 4 miles north of it, on highway 10) , I knew I had to work it in!
    You deserve a cruise, after all the recent shenanigans in your life.

    I suppose it was a bit irreverent of me, Livingisdetail.
    I’m picturing some poor slob on the pay phone with his wife Minnie, and promising, “I’ll be there in a min, Minn…” And that’s how the myth began.

  6. jamesviscosi says:

    Ha, we upstate New Yorkers used to go to Canada specifically to get our hands on your Molson. (Well, not ME specifically … but other upstate New Yorkers I used to know did!)

  7. lavenderbay says:

    I’m glad to have supplied a bit of nostalgia for you, James! I understand our suds are a little thicker than yours. It’ll be a sad day indeed when people need a passport just to get a 5-percent brewski.

  8. Alyson says:

    You are too too clever Lavenderbay, you should have a 900-Limerick number next to my 900-almost psychic number!! We’ll be rich Mwahhahahaaaa!! Ahem.

    Thankyou, the Hill family chortles at your limericks! 🙂

  9. lavenderbay says:

    We just get more and more brilliant, Alyson! We’ll have those phone numbers with just one digit different, so we can catch each other’s fumble-fingered clients. “I’m sorry to hear that your husband burnt your pumpkin patch and ran off with the drive-through clerk, and that you’d like to know how long before he repents so you can be home from your secret trip to the Patagonia before he arrives with the bouquet. On the other hand, There once was an oyster from Ghent…”

  10. Gina says:

    I really love the Jack-inspired leprechaun limerick! They are all very witty though. 🙂

    About your shepherd’s pie..I love shepherd’s pie and have it occasionally at an Irish pub/restaurant we often frequent. Cliff usually has the fish and chips.

  11. Gina says:

    I just saw your latest limerick in your sidebar (Occupational Hazard). hehehehe

  12. lavenderbay says:

    Fish and chips is the other favourite at our local, Gina! Along with the steak-and-mushroom pie. And the liver. And oh dear I’ll never save for that backyard if I don’t do more cooking at home! 😉
    I’m glad you like the latest batch of limericks. Maybe the “analyst” one would resonate with Cliff in his line of work (the psychiatric stuff, not the set-building stuff) .

  13. Alyson says:

    …who created a pearl he called Trent

    And you can probably find that lost pearl down the side of your favorite arm chair, where it was lost back in May….perhaps there was a storm literally or maybe even figuratively, going on in your home at that time…that’ll be $300 – I love it!

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