This is a true story [cue distant wolf howl]. This e-mail was sent on All Hallows Eve eve.
Do you remember that celery-coloured coat you bought eight years ago?
The one that’s gotten a bit snug?
The one with the broken zipper?
The one you replaced with that beautiful happy aqua coat last year, that you now wear instead of the celery coat –
The one that you forgot to clean out last winter,
And left dog biscuits in one pocket,
So now it’s full of bugs?
Do you still want it?